Festivals Yay, Chores Nay!

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 95 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

They did it again. They ... well, I don't quite know who they are, but they made me do chores and those weird quest things again. I had such a great old time, prancing about the Shire and Winterhome, gathering up new ponies and eating my fill. It was good fun as well, I'm telling you, Diary. Food, drink and merriment at every other corner. And I even got to act again. Oh yes. I'm a little actress and I did a fantastic job. Just like last year.

I also went sightseeing. It's fun after all, and gets you away from annoying minstrels and crazy lore-mistresses. So I went to the Misty Mountains and visited my good friends the goblins. They were building nice fires for me to keep warm and also cooked me stuffs. Though I have to say it didn't exactly taste all that great. Oh well...

And I did my best to ignore certain bits of mail in my mailbox. Ithil's been chattering about Edoras, and problems in Western Rohan, but I ignored her. I also ignored that weird Gillyweed person who was babbling inanely (like always) about her uber ratsnest (bog lurker) and this song called "Ring of Fire". I think it was a song at least. Anyway, so I'm digressing. I ignored them. I'm good at that. I simply sharpened my daggers a bit. Or ate another pie or two. Or, yes, three.

But then G came up to me, sat down and handed me a cake. At this point, dear Diary, I should have known something was up and I wouldn't like it. He smiled all sweetly like and announced that while Snowbourn was nice and all, he was growing restless. An elf. Restless. The thought! They sit around for hundreds of years doing nothing, but being in Snowie for all of six months is too long for Master Pointy Ears. The gall! He waved this letter in front of me then, and a map, saying we should maybe check out what was across the river. The river we were not so long ago told to not cross on pain of death. I told him he was crazy. And still somehow found myself in the little town of Entwade. Rohirrim and their naming of places. It sure is impressive. Not.

And after lots of running around, and chores, and killing things that apparently needed killing, we ended up at the Hornburg in Helm's Deep. Now I don't know for sure, but I think something bad's gonna happen here pretty darn soon. But that's for another day I think. Because now Megilieth decided to join us out here in Rohan, and she can have the limelight for all I care. I'll just go and find something to eat.

Speaking of which, my dear friends Corudan and Horn have made me some munchies, so I'm off. Talk to you later.

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

Welcome to Rohan!

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 78 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

I'm in Rohan, Diary. Not because I changed my mind about going there, oh no. But I've been receiving more and more messages from the inhabitants of Langhold, basically begging me to come and help them as they had this crazy minstrel passing through who wreaked havoc...I wonder who that was...and offering lots and lots of pies and cookies. I couldn't say no to that, could I?

So I grabbed G by his pointy ears and off we went to...Caras Galadhon? Seems Galadriel wanted to chat to us some, and nice hobbit that I am, I let her. Who knew we'd get food and stuffs out of it? Made me very happy indeed. Then we headed off downriver, stopped at Stangard to pick up Horn...Nona was totally nonchalant about it, but I wonder if those two...and finally we reached the East Wall and the Argonath.

The whole place was overrun by orcs, but G and I sent them packing. We also did a bit of sightseeing, for example we went up to Amon Hen and I sat in the Seat of Seeing with G standing guard...well, he is a guardian after all. We also saw the Falls of Rauros and the lawn of Parth Galen where we met a party of adventurers from Gondor.

Unfortunately said adventurers were a bit crappy and got us to free their dwarven friend from his Uruk Hai captors...and obviously they also forgot to mention the Nazgûl we inevitably ran into... Why oh why are there so many idiots in Middle-earth? Doesn't matter. After the Ring-wraith had been dealt with, we stumbled upon this cave, and found this baby bog-lurker...so cute! G mumbled something like 'both of you are' but when I asked him to repeat that, he wouldn't. Maybe because I was pointing my dagger at him...silly elf!

Having a bite to eat at the Thane's house.

But I hadn't forgotten all the letters and obviously wanted to pick up all the promised food, eh... I mean I really wanted to help the good people of Langhold, so off we went and found that the children in Rohan are like totally tough. Where a little hobbit would cry when he or she got punted all over the place, Rohirrim children love that kind of thing. And they thought that I would like it as well. I think parenting classes are in order...just saying.

Somewhere, somehow, something went seriously wrong in their upbringing...

All was going rather well until some insane person thought it'd be a great idea to invite the Nazgûl that had previously destroyed the town over to 'talk things over'. Guess how that ended, Diary. Give you a hint, we're all stranded in Harwick... But at least I got a nice war-pony out of it. Take the good with the bad, as I like to say...unless the bad is bad food.

Speaking of which, I'm off to grab some munchies now, so I shall speak to you later, Diary! Oh, but before I forget, apparently the Squirrel is now all Rohirrim as well and reached something 85 or other. Whatever...

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

Get Ready to Scramble!

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

I'm thoroughly enjoying myself right now. The Faire is absolutely grand, though at nighttime, I always feel a bit...full. I hope I'm not turning into a glutton like the Mayor. That would be bad as I'm already looking forward to more adventuring. But for now, I'm still in the Shire, and Diary, I'm loving it.

I have also spoken to Little Miss Lazy, also known as Petunia Hornblower, and she is just... It's seriously unbelievable! I know laziness is an old Hobbit tradition, but she is taking it way too far! So initially she just wanted me to gather bait for her fishing extravaganza. Okay, fine, I can do that. Off I went, got some worms, and back I went to get my Farmers Faire Tokens... But no...

Suddenly she doesn't know how to hook the bait, tuh! And then she got all grossed out and asked me to do her fishing for her! The gall! So of course I went and did her fishing only to be degraded to delivery hobbit. Off to Hobbiton I went to meet Hal Hornblower. He said she was about the neediest person in the Shire and advised me to put my foot down. No more errands! And lo and behold, it worked. Petunia grumbled, but still handed over the Tokens. I will never talk to her again!

After I was done huffing and puffing, I decided to head to Sandson's Farm once more. And I have to say that chasing chicken around after Petunia chased me around...it felt really nice. I stayed there for an hour or two, enjoying the fun game of Egg Scramble, until I was told, politely, that I should stop frightening the living daylight out of the chicken. And that I should stop stealing the Festive Eggs. Whatever.

I was very rich in Faire Tokens upon my return to Bywater and decided to go shopping. The seamstresses have created the cutest outfit to match the Farmers Faire Steed, and I think I went a bit overboard with my shopping spree. But no matter. I'm a hobbit of good taste and good taste rarely is cheap.

Unfortunately, the Faire is only running until next Monday but luckily Ithil said it wouldn't be long until the Summer Festival. So yay for that!

In other, more boring news, Gilerian finally hit the big 75 and managed to somehow get people to take her to Isengard. So now she's the proud owner of a full Armour of the Iordúr set. No idea what that is, but she's happy. Of course now she's moaning that she has to run around all over the place to do deeds for virtues. Deeds I understand. But she completely lost me when she mentioned virtues. What are those? She just patted my head and wandered off. How dare she!

And the evil Sith sent a message that she is now 33 and still on Alderaan. Slacking much? Of course I'd never say that to her face...purple lightning and all that. But really, she is a bit...slow...

Right, I just smelled some freshly made pies, so I better run. Take care, Diary. Enjoy the last Faire days and I shall see you at the Summer Festival.

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

New Ponies and Festivals

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

I'm so very sorry...there was nothing I could do. That evil Santhea-person just took you from my hands and off she went. She was positively scary, there was purple lighting buzzing all around her and stuff. And when she brought you back, she told me she would get you again whenever she fancies. And I'm only little, I can't stand up to her. And even Wyn, who should be big and strong and brave and all that, even she was hiding away from the evil Sith-lord. Though...how can a girl be a lord I wonder...

Be that as it may, I do apologise. But I think it might be easier for all of us to just let her abuse you once in a while. Because otherwise...I don't even want to think about what she'd do to the both of us, dear Diary. I'm just glad she didn't burn you or anything like that...

Now where were we last time? Oh yes, I was telling you about that stupid horse at Hengstacer Farm... I'm still doing my chores there whenever I can, and so is Ithil. However, she was talking about some weird old man, dressed all in white and a nice white horsie called Shadowfax... I think she's delusional again. Got clobbered over the head one too many times or something like that. Wouldn't surprise me considering where she goes every week. And if you're wondering where, Diary, to Orthanc...that's where. She's still trying to defeat that Saruman on Tier Two (and I still don't know what that means). At least she managed Lightning and Fire and Frost this week...but as there are trolls and giants there, I wouldn't be surprised if they hit her over the head a bit...or a bit more.

I for one am enjoying the quiet life right now, although it will become a bit busier come tomorrow. The Farmer's Faire is coming to town, and it's my first year attending. I'm sure there will be lots of food, drink and music, and as you know, that's the sort of thing I love most. Well, that and a bit of burglary. But there's always a way to combine stuff, isn't there. I could, for example, burgle some food, right? Very excited, and I hope it will meet my high expectations...

Oh, and I received a gift today. I think Wynnie did something steamy, which netted all of us a new means of transportation...a new pony in my case. It's called Hazy and I just love it. It's just the cutest ever, just look at the way it blows 'steam' from its nostrils! I absolutely love it.

Hazy the Cute, also known as a Noble Grey Pony

Oh dear, it's getting late and I still have to do my chores before lunch. I really have to be off. And I promise, Diary, Santhea won't hurt you. She just wants to express herself and all her evilness. We just, you know, have to get to know her better, and maybe we can learn something from her in the end...

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

A Quiet Summer of Chores?

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

How could you?! I turn my back on you for...okay, it was quite some time, but still... And what do you do? You run off with the crazy minstrel! Her of all people! I had a massive go at her and in the end we sort of agreed to disagree. She thinks I abandoned you and said if she sees you lying about, she would keep you company. Eventually though, she promised she would only ever 'borrow' you at festival times when I'm 'otherwise engaged', but still...

And then Wynnie was too lazy to write anything because of something called 'football'...what is that anyway? Once again, dear Diary, I am forced to come to but one conclusion...I'm surrounded by idiots! Well, not completely surrounded, there are some really nice peeps out there too, but you get my meaning...

Anyway, let me tell you about going home to the Shire and the festivities there. I don't think I've seen so much food and drink anywhere else in Middle-earth. Hobbits are the best! However, after visiting Moria I have to admit...grudgingly I might add...that dwarves are a close second when it comes to foodstuffs. But we're still the best, so hah!

I ate and drank and sang, and even went riding a bit, but when I saw little Miss Perfect's (also known as Ithilwen, Diary Thief) new horse I knew it wasn't for me. A Rohan theme? No thank you! But it seems I can't avoid Rohan despite my efforts to have a quiet and comfortable summer.

I received a letter summoning me to Combe. As it's a little village just north of Staddle and I just happened to be there anyway to visit some friends (who've left the Shire years ago to live in the more adventurous world of the Big Folk), I went there. What's the worst that could happen in Bree-land, eh? I think I must have been suffering from amnesia or something like that... Clearly I didn't think of Black Riders and Rangers turning into wraiths.

But 'luckily' it wasn't Nazgûl that were waiting for me in Combe. It was a wandering horse. And as it turned out, the stable hand in Combe was unable to take care of a horse...because he's a wuss! You probably can tell where this is going, dear Diary. Who was asked to do chores again? Me! I had to go find straw, I had to see to the new horseshoes. Me!

And now I'm sitting around at Hengstacer Farm looking after even more horses! What happened to my quiet summer?! At least Emma Rosethorn is a good cook... Positive thinking, Diary...

Ithil visits me at times, as does Wyn. They, too, have been asked to help with the chores, so at least I'm not alone. And yesterday Varnie popped up all giddy because she finally reached some sort of level cap of 65. She wasn't all that happy anymore after I pointed out that I was 75, even though I still don't know what that means. And after I said that soon we'd be able to be 85 she looked quite suicidal...oh well.

So off she went to Dunland, with a quick detour to Harndirion to pick up some armour, and if I don't hear from her again, I'll just assume that she go herself killed. Or that she's gonna sit around moping for years again.

Oh, Emma just called me to lunch so I better run. And Diary...don't you go wandering off to Minstrels again!

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

A Festival of Creeps

Diary entry by Ithilwen, level 75 Minstrel, Gilrain


Dear Diary of Wynniekins,

You have been officially ninjaed. Or rather, I took you up when the silly hobbit discarded you so very carelessly at the sight of pies and ale and pipeweed. Yes, she's run off to the Party Tree, leaving a note to not disturb her for the next two weeks. And she left you as well, Diary... Sad, isn't it?

But I'm nice, despite the things Wynniekins says about me, and am going to keep you company until she returns. Exit silly hobbit, enter balanced human.


So pretty! And very well-behaved as well. So what have I been up to lately? Well, let me tell you. The Spring Festival has started and that means a new horse is out and has to be added to my collection. This time around, I had to win two races as opposed to the previous festivals and get 40 Spring Leaves. Not that this was really an issue as I had some left-over Leaves from last year, and winning horse races is not exactly hard.

So I went to the Shire and Bree and got my Race Tokens and did a few quests in the Hedge Maze and voilà, we have ourselves a new horsie. I'm really loving it as it foreshadows where we are going to head this autumn (or so I've been told). Simbelmynë are small white flowers that commonly grow on the barrows of the kings of Rohan and having a Simbelmynë Steed and matching tunics, dresses and cloaks is just lovely. The seamstresses must have been really busy.

I've also been rather mean to the hobbitses of the Shire, or more precisely, the blasted Inn League. Those awfully nice and lovey dovey hobbits make my skin crawl, so I made it my mission to sabotage them whenever and wherever possible. And it so happens that there are dwarves who share my feelings towards those...those midgets! Pesky little critters, the lot of them (well, maybe not Wynniekins, but I'm telling you that Frodo is seriously annoying and I only really talked to him once in Rivendell). So I joined the Ale Association and have the highest standing possible with them. They call me a Creep, and I'm proud of it!

Other than that, I have been killing real creeps in the Ettenmoors again. I really don't know what's going on there, but every time us Free Peoples turn our backs on that particular area of Eriador, the minions of Angmar overrun everything again. Including the keeps. But it's kinda fun to vanquish them as the more we kill, the better rewards we get from the lovely folk up in Glân Vraig. Not too long ago, I got a new horse from them for example, it's a bit slow but still very nice to look at. My friend Wyn isn't too happy about me having it though, she mumbled something about having wanted it for ages and some such. But it's not my fault that I go to the Moors and she isn't, is it? And they also give you titles...and right now I can't wait to finally reach enough standing with them to be called Lieutenant. Just think... Lieutenant Ithilwen. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

But I have to head off. There's more dark deeds to be done on behalf of my Dwarven friends, and more creeps to be killed. And maybe, just maybe I'll even have time to head back into the Tower of Orthanc. We shall see...

Ithilwen, riding off for now, but might be back later.

I Hate Reeds!

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

I want to go back home! I really, really do! Stupid G and his even stupider, but still quite shiny bauble! And stupid people who told him about it in the first place...yes, Wyn is a bloody idiot! Did Miss Perfect and Brilliant really have to 'casually' mention that the people of the Rushgore are seeking adventures and will hand out this stupid thing that is apparently oh-so-great for guardians? Was that really necessary?!

As if the ghosts on the Field of Celebrant hadn't been bad enough... At least there I'd still been able to SEE where I was going. But those accursed reeds in the Rushgore? They are something else entirely! About six times as tall as me... Bleh! And of course we had to go out there and kill stuffs again (because the Rushgore-ians are too lazy to leave their little camps). There's turtles that are as big as my cousin's hobbit hole, I kid you not... And the bugs! Bigger than me once again, and annoying as they can punt you away from them as if they were playing...some kind of game of sports. Wynniekins = not amused! And their queen was just massive! But very stupid as she didn't know the answer to my riddles and was standing around REALLY confused for a long time and was pretty much dead before she got out of this dazed state.

But before we even made it to Rushgore, I had to do some chores again, well...of sorts. There are these ruins south of the Field of Celebrant called - and this will really surprise you, dear Diary - Ost Celebrant. Apparently some not so good things happened there years ago (or so that ghost thing person told me) and we had to help make things a bit less, um, ghostly? Anyway, one problem was that there was treasure. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but treasure tends to be a GOOD thing normally. But no, this treasure is cursed apparently, and G and I were asked to throw some HUGE chests into the Limlight river. Did I mention that said chests were huge? And heavy! I think it was all just a ploy by some robbers who just couldn't be bothered to go into the ruins themselves and just fished the shinies out of the water instead. That's what I would do, I guess...

After carrying chests and battling reeds, it was time for us to cross the river Anduin. The Great River. Like a body of water...lots of water. I totally wasn't scared. Not at all. It's just that I was happy to reach the other side as I'm, um, a very curious hobbit and wanted to see what's on the far bank, yes. What we found wasn't something to write home about. Trolls, cats, crazy Easterlings...the usual. We also found the Desolation of the Garden... It used to be the beautiful home of the Entwives the Ent Gnarlstump told us, but now it is a barren wasteland overrun by stupid trolls. As a hobbit, my heart was breaking a little when I beheld the sad state of the place. I might not like gardening myself, but this is just...

There was one thing, however, that really stood out. Something that drove home once again that we are in very much hostile lands now where even the most dreadful enemies might lurk around the next corner. We found the Fellbeast of one of the Ring-wraiths, shot down by a Rohirrim arrow. I'm worried, Diary, for without his steed, the Nazgûl must still be around somewhere...

I think I need to go have some food before all this worrying does funny things to my appetite. But before I go, I've been asked to tell you that Wynnie (the person who writes this diary for me) is writing something new. Please check out Wynnie goes Free to Play! Okay, let's see if I can find some munchies around here, wish me luck!

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

Silly Eagles and an even Sillier Squirrel

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

So after our visit to Orthanc, I decided to take a break from dreadful monsters and went back to Stangard. I also brought my cookbook so at long last those silly Rohirrim people would know how to cook for a hobbit. But alas, as G and I got there, we found things had taken a rather unfortunate turn.

But before going into town, G reminded me that we were told to visit someone in this glade thing. Turns out it was Gwaihir's brother Landroval who wished to talk to us. It seems his friend Meneldor got lost or something, and of course it's up to US to find him. G dragged me away before I could start yelling at Landroval...

We found the silly eagle in a cave, hanging from a big cobweb... Big cobweb means big spiders. And I don't like spiders. The small ones are bad enough, but what was coming towards us in the cave... But I'm a brave burglar and am showing no fear, not even when facing eeky eight-legs.

Of course we killed the incy wincy, big massive spider without much fuss...well, I did, G is more of a 'bark but not bite' kinda elf. And once the deed was done, Meneldor was rather pleased and even offered to fly us back to Landroval. But as we got back, we were presented with a note from Stangard...no good news... Apparently all hell has broken loose since we left, and one of our so-called friends there had to run off to some farm. Farm equals chores, farms are bad! But you know, with things as bad as they were, even I couldn't moan about a few farm chores that we obviously had to do. G joked that we're the chore-loving heroes. I nearly kicked him in the shin!

So we had to go sort all of that out and then, as we were finally sitting down to dinner, Squirrel showed up. We told her about the eagles and she just shrugged her shoulders and said, "Meneldor loves that spider-infested cave it would seem." I prodded her a little, and she told me that she, too, had been required to 'save' the idiotic eagle. I swear, the next time I see him...

With my homicidal, or eagle-cidal plans formed and ready for execution, I really thought I could have a nice and quiet evening. However, Isquariel was bouncing like a crazy bunny, so we finally had enough and asked what she was so happy about. She claimed she not only visited with Saruman as well, but even stole his cloak's clasp... I am the burglar here! Who does Miss ZapZap think she is?!

After that weekend, I decided to go back to the cheerfulness that is Mirkwood today. Killed some spiders, chaperoned an orc...the usual. And now I'm having tea with my good friend Gorothúl...

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

The Big 75, Whatever That May Be...

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 75 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

Being abroad has some drawbacks unfortunately...I missed the Egg Festival celebrations in the Shire. No pancakes, omelettes, scrambled, boiled or fried eggs for me this year. Makes me a very sad hobbit. And then G actually went and said that this might be a good thing as I was a bit pod.. I clobbered him over the head at that point. Stupid elf!

So instead of basking in the sun and stuffing my face, I had to work this year. G finally managed to drag me to Dunbog and then east towards Tâl Methedras. I know now why Squirrel didn't tell me what would happen there...because they went and took us captive! One moment we were in Dunland, the next we're in the dungeons of Isengard. I think they must have knocked me out in between because otherwise how could I have crossed miles upon miles in the blink of an eye?

The things we were made to do during our captivity...they make farm chores look like fun. I mean, collecting slob? Really? Just disgusting! And meeting Saruman himself...that was scary. I most definitely WON'T add him to my Yule Festival card list...

Once we freed ourselves, we taught the Falcon Clan not to go messing with hobbits or elves and they ran off into their caves like Shire shrews. Even though they claimed that they were really the victorious ones, I think they were just plain sacred of us. Well, of me really, G isn't all that frightening...

After a well deserved break for crafting, and more importantly, eating, we finally did what Wyn and Ithil have been telling us to do for ages... We went to Stangard! And I was once again proven right! The food situation there was beyond dire and it was up to us to fix it. In other words, roll around more bloody chores! Funny thing was that at some point people started to congratulate us because we reached the Big 75. I think people are insane. I mean, Big 75? What's that supposed to be? Level cap or something? What are we, in a game?! Whatever...

But insanity seems to follow me wherever I go... Yesterday, G dragged me kicking and screaming to a certain dragon and then to Isengard. G is my friend no longer! At least his crazy burg friend gave me some marbles, they're shiny... But maybe I should reconsider. Going to those scary places got me some new armour, especially my new hat...I look utterly cool in it!

Oops, it's time for food (I'm back in Galtrev, where the food is good) so I better go.

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

A Short Break

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 70 Burglar, Gilrain


Dear Diary,

I managed to convince G to lay low for a bit and just enjoy the hospitality of all the lovely people in Galtrev. Because I really REALLY don't want to go to that boggy place. Eeky wet and smelly places aren't my idea of a fun outing, so I'm gonna stall for as long as possible. And believe me, I'm the master of excuses...

But you know, it's not just that I don't like swamps... Squirrel, eh, I mean Isquariel went there yesterday and the stories she was telling me were just...gross. She said the slugs are bigger than me, not to mention the turtles and avancs... But those aren't the worst of it.

Apparently someone conducted scientific experiments and created mutant orcs and trolls. And while that sounds really intriguing, I'd rather study them from afar. And Galtrev is just about far enough... Ithil told me not to be a baby about it and that it's just like DN. That DN place sounds like something to avoid at all costs!

However it's something else my Rune-Keeper friend said that really freaked me out... She went to Tâl Methedras yesterday but wouldn't tell me why or what she did there. All I got was a cryptic, "Wait and see for yourself." So of course I'm a bit psyched because it sounds bad... But there's something else. I get the feeling I'm doing the exact same stuff she did before...WHY?!

While I was pondering, and munching, Wyn the Crazy showed up and told me she defeated Saruman again. Firstly...AGAIN?! And secondly...there's professionals that deal with insanity, right? I think I have to get her some help and fast...

Why is it, dear diary, that I'm the only sane person around? And where, pray tell, is my lunch?

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

Lazy Falcons

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 70 Burglar, Gilrain

Dear Diary,

The people of Tûr Morva are just bloody lazy, aren't they? They flipping made me do chores again! And food is also hard to come by, safe for some Billberry Pies, and they won't last me very long... When I asked for second breakfast they just stared at me blankly. I really want to leave this food-forsaken place!

But G said we should just stick it out as these quests would give us enough experience to give us another level...um, does he think we're in some kind of game?! Crazy elf!

However, it's not just the lack of munchies that makes me want to go back to Galtrev and its cooks... That Lheu Brenin guy gives me the creeps. I have a hunch that he's not as friendly as he pretends to be... Then again, he gave me some really nice pants...

Still I was glad to return to proper meals in Galtrev...even though we were cutting it close for dinner. Sitting around the fire now is nice though. I still have a few muffins to nibble on, and once they're done, I'm sure there'll be more where these came from...

One thing is odd though. That one guy, Morn, used to take weird stuff like Spotted Ears and Bent Metal Maces from me and told his friends how awesome I am...he won't do that anymore... Not that they're not already worshipping me, but still...

Oh no! G just said we should move on to Dunbog tomorrow, and I really don't want to go... I don't like swamps, especially if the have lots of water and I have to swim... Not that I'm scared or anything...

Anyway, if he wants to head out tomorrow, I better get myself ready...

Wynniekins Cutthroat, singing off.

Shades and Chores

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 69 Burglar, Gilrain

Dear Diary,

Ithil's madness has unfortunately spread to Gilerian. Now Miss Crazy Lore-mistress is convinced that she killed the Lieutenant of Dol Guldur yesterday, a Ring-wraith. I'm starting to see a trend here. Apparently it's IN amongst the insane population to off Nazgûl... Not my idea of fun, but if it makes them happy... Not that Gilly was particularly happy as the LT didn't drop his doormat...whatever.

However, it is not just the spreading insanity amongst my friends that I want to tell you about...it's my so-called friend G (the guardian I mentioned before). He had the brilliant idea of moving on to the Bonevales...idiotic elf! The main part of the population of that fun place is undead shades! And their favourite past-time seems to be turning hobbits either undead as well or, failing that, completely dead. We barely made it out of there...in time for tea! And missing meals is just rude.

And as if that hadn't been enough, G then suggested going to that FARM! I told him in no uncertain words that I don't do farms or chores. Why does he think I not only left the Shire but changed my name as well? So no one would ask why I wasn't back home on our stupid farm, that's why! But G said, no promised we wouldn't have to do any chores...

G is a bloody liar!

Okay, first we just had to help a few baddies on their journey to the afterlife...but then it was 'gather carrots', 'collect tanned hides and blankets', 'get wool of sheepsies' and lastly 'gather eggs'. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's CHORES! I gave Mr Pointy-Ear a piece of my mind and I bet his ears are still ringing!

Now we're sitting in this stupid little village and they're running late making dinner! I think I have to go and tell them that all those heroic deeds (like gathering eggs) make for one very hungry hobbit...

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

Time for luncheon?

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 68 Burglar, Gilrain

Dear Diary,

Ithil, crazy minstrel extraordinaire, told me a story today...a story that either goes to show that I was right when I said I wouldn't join her and Wyn in the Great River region...or it's a clear sign that she's gone loopy. According to her, she went and fought a Nazgûl yesterday... So either she's incredibly brave or incredibly stupid...your choice. Of course there's the other option of her being insane, wouldn't surprise me with the company she's keeping. That burg she hangs out with is just creepily OP!

Anyway, I'm digressing. So she was walking through this swamp with her Dunlanding friend...the reed there is twice Ithil's height, so not gonna go there myself... So they were walking and chatting about this legend (Ithil told me all about it but I kinda dozed off) and suddenly part of their morale bar (what's that anyway?) goes all red like something dreadful is going to happen... And up pops Mr Ring-wraith and they have to fight it. And Ithil tries to tell me that they survived that...as if!

And after all this, she and her crazy burg friend went and killed some giant spiders, trolls and WALKING TREES! Insane people! And tomorrow they intend to go into Mirkwood and fight another Nazgûl... You know something, I'd rather go without supper than do something so insanely stupid!

Speaking of food, it's time for luncheon, so I think I better hurry.

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.

What's for second breakfast?

Diary entry by Wynniekins Cutthroat, level 68 Burglar, Gilrain

Dear Diary,

I was woken by a 'little' girl, or boy...can't be sure with those little big people... Anyway, I was woken by the little brat who apparently lost, and get this, a toy! What am I? Lost and found?

So I told the kid that I wasn't in the business of finding toys, unless they're made of gold and then I wouldn't necessarily return them, and all I got was a tearful, "But I want my ball back!"

I explained that I'd only just woken up and that a hobbit simply couldn't function without breakie. The kid's face suddenly lit up and he/she produced some blueberry muffins and a meat pie. "My mommy told me to give you this..." Blackmailed by a kid. Just brilliant.

But who could resist muffins and pie? Sure, I'd have preferred some Lothlórien Waybread (and don't give me that 'one small bite' nonsense, I always have at least one or two whole ones) but the kid's mum is an awesome cook. Much better than Gilerian...

So I go and find out that a crow flew off with the kid's ball. A CROW?! Didn't take me long to find the real culprit and after some running around and silly chores, things ended as they always seem to do lately. With some nice back-stabbing action and the subsequent demise of Mr Crazy Crow-guy.

And the best thing is that I got back to Galtrev just in time for second breakfast... So, what's on the menu today?

Wynniekins Cutthroat, signing off.